NEWLOVE

“I love fat kids who run things,” said Brad over a beer, an episode of the Unit and election results.

I was talking about my neighbor downstairs who was a newlywed when I first moved to this apartment almost 7 years ago and how strange it’s been to witness her get pregnant and have a baby. I’ve watched the baby being pushed around in a stroller and the next thing I know he’s running around with real clothes and shoes and talks and plays with his friends and whatnot. He must be 5 years old now and he is built like an 8 or 9 year old.

So Brad starts to tell me about the other kids in the building and how he loves the fat kid on the second floor diagonally across from us. “That kid is just cool. Everytime I see him, he’s like, ‘What’s up, man?’ and he’s just a cool little dude. I love to watch him interact with his little friends. He’s the ringleader. I love to watch him explain the rules of whatever made-up game they’re playing and whenever they’re huddled around, it’s always over some gadget that he brought. He has all the coolest toys. I love fat kids who run things.”

I had a dream last night about Kirsty and Scott having sex.  Shut up, I know!  It wasn’t a threesome or anything kinky.  I was not present in the room with them - I kind of was a fly on the wall.  It was very tender and romantic between them, actually.

What I want to know is why am I having dreams about other people having sex and not dreams about my own sexlife??

Wonder what Freud would have to say about it.

So I called Kirsten to tell her I dreamt about their sexy night and she confessed that they’ve been really busy lately and haven’t had any action but that the very night I dreamt about it was the first night they finally had sex in quite a while!

Now I’m a little freaked out.  I wish there was a way to make money with this “gift” of mine!